I have been super sporadic in my writing. Not gonna lie, life has been crazy busy between work, traveling, and just plain ol' busy livin. I think the quote goes something like this: "get busy livin' or get busy dyin," and that is exactly how I have been feeling. I finally found a few quiet moments at my desk with a great glass of wine and one of my many yoga CD's playing and decided to post.
As I am reflecting on the past month or so, I am realizing that the energy I am living in is somewhat frenetic. Actually, a lot frenetic. It's not how I like to operate but what I have realized is that going with the flow is a lot easier than resisting. When I am operating under a fast pace for multiple days at a time, I seriously start to feel like a neglected puppy dog...choices are made, sometimes I come home and eat nachos because I have no energy to make anything else, my laundry piles up to a mini-Mt. Everest, and my yoga mat starts to collect dust. Now, a year ago, I would be in panic mode but I have gotten to the point where I know that things will stabilize out again and eventually get back to normal.
The key lesson I embody is a Buddhist lesson, pure and simple: non-attachment. I am very careful I don't get stuck in the thinking that this will last forever. Sure, I get in arguments with The Man, little things set me off, but for the most part, I know "this too shall pass." I am always under this impression that somewhere exists the "perfect balance." It is soooo elusive, but I am constantly trying to find it.
True Fact: It is hard to strike a balance (if balance truly exists) between being productive and finding time to relax on the weekend. Today was a perfect example: I woke up at 8am, went for a walk around Green Lake with the puppy, got my oil changed, went downtown for lunch with The Man, took the bus home after he split to go to work, went to the hardware store to pickup garden stuff (big sale), had to get gas, came home and worked in the yard for a good 2 hours, made a grocery list, went shopping, came home, cooked dinner, and then attacked my messy office post dishwashing and now, finally writing and sipping.
Gardening is an ABSOLUTELY PERFECT metaphor for anything and everything. We are constantly in process, we need to nurture and take care to help grow, we have cycles, we bloom, we die, we are resilient. Working in my garden is so incredibly therapeutic and relaxing. Of course, I have heard this my whole life from others but to actually have my own garden and my own time in the dirt, it makes me so happy.
I am so grateful for where I am at, even if it is a bit frenetic and draining. I know that I get to come home every night and witness growth and the fruits of my labor. I get to make a choice at the end of the day if my circumstances and situations will hold me back or if they, in the end, will help me...